Monthly Archives: December 2008

Script Track – December 30, 2008

A lonely 8-year-old boy finds a magical set of crayons that come to life and help him save his family’s house from being foreclosed on.
Based on a pitch by Tim Burton.

Office comedy. Plot being kept under wraps.

The Tape That Didn’t Stick
Set in 1916, a fictionalized biography of Marshall Denton, the man who created Scotch tape, only in this version, he was also the man who tried to organize a coup to install a puppet regime in Bolivia.
Writer: Charlie Kaufman

Puppies & Yuppies
A sickly sweet comedy following the lives of three different dog owners as they try to find love in New York. Best In Show with boring people and less laughs.
Writer: Randy Brickman

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MPAA develops special rating for Michael Bay films

Warns adults of silly, unwatchable content


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Filed under Directors, Industry News

Agent finally gets around to reading 2007 holiday card

Still hasn’t looked at 2-year-old script sent in by same writer

agent-talk-logoLiterary agent Michael Hansen made a considerable dent in his reading pile yesterday, finally opening a Christmas card sent to him in December of last year by aspiring screenwriter Phil Smithe.

“I still haven’t got to his script, though,” said Hansen. “In fact, I think I may have given it to my old assistant as a birthday present.”

According to the busy lit agent, Smithe emailed him in March to see if he’d read either the holiday card or the family comedy ‘Kidasaurus Rex’ about an elementary school student who wakes up a dinosaur with super powers.

“I told him I was halfway through the card, but I hadn’t started the script yet,” said Hansen. “He emailed me back right away thanking me for the read and reminding me that he’d recently self-published a book about dinosaurs, so the idea ‘already had some traction’ in the marketplace.”

Hansen plans to read Smithe’s 2008 holiday card sometime after he retires.

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Unmerry Christmas for UTA: Santa switches to Endeavor

Elves to stay put at UTA–for now


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THR Video — CAA set to launch “Death Star News” in 2009

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Filed under Agent Talk, Industry News, Video

Script Track – December 23, 2008

Love In The Time of Cauliflower
A divorced gardener falls in love with one of his clients, New York’s most renowned chef, who is also divorced and not really looking for love at the moment. Sappiness ensues.
Writer: Sally Bernfeld

Thriller about a secret organization that crosses all political and governmental lines to decide which countries go to war with which, and when.
Based on a pitch by Michael Bay.

Midlife Crisis
A realistic comedy about some suburban guy going through a midlife crisis.
Writer: Judd Apatow

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A Quick Review Of The Week’s Top News…

SAG changes logo to double-smile in bold PR move
‘Might help with negotiations’ says guild prez



CAA celebrates 1,000,000,000th query letter rejected
Venerable agency throws lavish party to commemorate ‘ass-tightedness’



Ben Silverman back on the crunk



Grateful screenwriter finds quarter in futon



Your script dies a hero in producer’s fireplace



Gilroy takes Diablo Cody’s advice, turns to stripping
Scribe hopes it will bolster future Oscar chances



Clooney forgets to wax eyebrows for two straight weeks



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Filed under Actors, Execs, Industry News, Writers

Script Track — December 16, 2008

Blackberry Sam
Set in the year 2024, when mobile devices have been infused with artificial intelligence, an international spy is partnered with the latest Blackberry device, codename “Sam.”
Knight Rider with a Blackberry.

Women Drivers
Plot being kept under wraps.
Writer: Bert Royal

The true story of the rise and fall of corrupt Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich, accused of selling President-elect Barack Obama’s open Senate seat.
Writer: Rod Blagojevich
Kyle McLaughlin attached.

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Nikki Finke out with new book: ‘TOLDJA! How I Scooped Everybody’

Explosive tell-all promises to blow lid off entire industry


Deadline Hollywood’s Nikki Finke is set to release her third book next month, the first since she skyrocketed to Internet fame as an industry darling thanks to her in-depth coverage of the Hollywood writers strike last winter.

According to Finke, ‘TOLDJA!’ will likely blow the lid off the entire industry and leave most of America slack-jawed with wonder.

“The hacks over at Variety and The Hollywood Reporter are too busy sucking up to Big Media to cover the important stories,” said Finke. “When people see what’s really going on behind closed doors in this town, they might stop watching movies and television altogether. At the very least, they’ll never turn on NBC again.”

The L.A. Weekly columnist has been uncharacteristically tight-lipped on the book’s contents, but her publisher has released a partial chapter list, hinting at a number of explosive scandals the 564-page tome may cover…

Chapter 1 — AMPTP: Collusion, Pyramid Scheme or Both?
Chapter 4 — What Peter Chernin Doesn’t Want You To Know About ‘House’
Chapter 5 — Guess Which Six Hollywood Executives Hate Me The Most

‘TOLDJA!’ hits shelves January 7, 2009.

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Morgenstern retires after public ignores his scathing review of ‘The Day the Earth Stood Still’

‘What’s the point?’ asks beleaguered WSJ film critic

morgensternJoe Morgenstern has seen his share of stinkers over the past 50 years, but the weekend box office numbers for ‘The Day the Earth Stood Still’ left the Wall Street Journal film reviewer so disgusted, he immediately sent an email of resignation to his editor.

“Clearly my work isn’t having any effect whatsoever,” said Morgenstern. “Most Americans would rather watch a bologna sandwich rot on screen than be challenged by films like ‘Milk’ or ‘Slumdog Millionaire.’”

According to Morgenstern’s review, the Keanu Reeves pic is “a dumb remake that’s insufferably full of itself…as cold and blank as the expression on Mr. Reeves’ face.” Despite Morgenstern’s unflattering review, the film opened to more than $30 million over the weekend.

“Ain’t that a bitch?” he said. “When I saw that number, I knew it was time to move on and do something that actually makes a difference, like reviewing video games. People actually care what the folks at think.”

When asked what they thought of Morgenstern’s resignation, most moviegoers were apathetic.

“Who?” asked Bob Johnson of suburban Detroit. “Whatever. The effects were awesome! Plus I’d totally bang that brunette chick.”

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