Meet The Spartans snubbed by Academy

Filmmakers shocked ‘poignant satire’ was overlooked

meet-spartans-posterEvery once in a while, a movie comes along that’s so unique and compelling, it’s a lock for Oscar gold. Such was not the case with Meet The Spartans, a sweeping spoof comedy that was completely locked out of this year’s nominations.

“It’s probably because the voters are lame-ass shit-dongs,” said Spartans co-director Aaron Seltzer. “This film has more gay jokes than Slumdog Millionaire and Milk combined. It’s like the Academy doesn’t even care about that stuff.”

Seltzer’s directing partner Jason Friedberg agreed.

“Blow me,” he said. “We worked on this script for like 45 minutes, and we don’t even get a single nod for Best Screenplay? That’s why we did the scene with Leonidas shoving the Oscar statuette up his ass. It’s a comment on the state of film critique in this country. Those fucknards are only interested in retarded movies that make most people want to vomit.”

According to Academy president Sid Ganis, Meet The Spartans was given proper consideration.

“Each film is judged on its own merit,” said Ganis. “Our members take their roles very seriously. Unfortunately we don’t yet have a ‘Worst Film’ category, otherwise Spartans certainly could’ve been nominated.”

Ganis then suggested Friedberg and Seltzer try making a quality film next time around.

“You know, one that doesn’t seem like it was written by a dyslexic 9-year-old,” he said.

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