‘Not even strong enough to rip a piece of duct tape’
After prematurely jumping on the 1980’s remake bandwagon, foolhardy producers recently admitted the film has no chance to move forward due to Richard Dean Anderson’s extreme old age.
“The guy’s old enough to be his own father,” said producer Michael Brody. “I wanted to have dinner with him on Tuesday to talk about possible storylines, but he had already eaten. It was only 4:45 in the afternoon!”
Anderson, who played the iconic MacGyver character back when he was 30 years younger and 100 pounds lighter, didn’t understand the decision.
“They said what now?” he asked. “And where’s my tapioca pudding? I can’t sleep without my pudding, and it’s already getting dark.”
The movie’s producers did consider replacing Anderson with a younger actor, but then opted to purchase the remake rights to Simon & Simon instead.