Despite improv classes, writer still less dynamic than wall

Agent distracted from pitch by mysterious nail hole near doorframe

Screenwriter Mark Benson’s efforts to improve his pitching ability have apparently failed, despite three months of improv comedy classes and countless hours practicing in front of a mirror.

“Someone was in here pitching me a script?” asked ICM agent Brian Johnson, a mere ten seconds after Benson left the room. “Oh, right, that guy with the…romantic comedy or something. Sorry, I was focused on that nail hole near the doorframe over there. I can’t remember if I had a picture hanging there…”

Benson, an IT consultant by day, has been trying to “get better in a room” for the past four years.

“I’m making progress,” he said. “A year ago, that guy falls asleep on me. At least now they’re remaining fully conscious, even if they do tend to zone out a bit 20 or 30 seconds into my pitch.”

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