Script Track – June 16, 2010

Death Star!
Caught up in the reality show craze, Darth Vader forces his underlings to compete in a talent competition to determine who will get to press the button on that laser destroying Leia’s home planet.
Sequel remake.

Provocative Fucking Title
Writer: Johnny Steel

What A Croc
Based on the popular footwear brand, this taut drama centers on a man who can’t find comfortable shoes that don’t make him feel like a douchebag.
Writer: Kevin Smith

Fanboy prays for continued health of J.J. Abrams

‘May he never stop making awesome movies’

16-year-old Bobby Cronendell of rural Ohio is the son of an Evangelical preacher, but he’s also a devout fanboy, which is why he asks Jesus every night to protect his idol J.J. Abrams from harm.

“Please Lord, at least keep him safe until he produces the Star Trek sequel in 2011,” Cronendell recently prayed. “I won’t watch late night Cinemax ever again, I promise.”

And those are just his bedtime prayers. According to Cronendell’s mom Judy, nearly half the time Bobby says grace before dinner, it’s a not-so-veiled plea for more action-packed entertainment.

“Please bless this food and all the wonderful people in the world, especially major motion picture directors who know exactly what the public wants,” he recently said at the dinner table. “You know who I’m talking about. Please watch over Kevin Smith too, I guess.”